Monday, February 1, 2010

An Open Letter to Nick Jr.

Mom in Vermont
Arctic Tundra Road
Middle of Nowhereville, VT

Nickelodeon Jr. (alias ‘Nick Jr.’, alias ‘Noggin TV’)
c/o Moose A. Moose
Viacom International Inc.
Los Angeles, CA

To Whom It May Concern:

Let me begin by stating that whether or not we like your programming has never been called into question. We love it! Our daughter wiggles, giggles and dances along with your cute and catchy songs. Her eyes light up at the very mention of the words “Fresh Beat Band” and I give you props for your learning-based programming.

However, I take issue with you stating "42 degrees, that's pretty cold!" Um... ya okay...maybe in SoCal sweetie. To us New Englanders (and I'm sure mommies in the Midwest will wholeheartedly agree) anything above 30 degrees is quite the unseasonable heatwave this time of year. Flip-flop weather even! I have to insist that you pull the plug on such questionable propaganda, or I shall be forced to take matters into my own hands! [And by "matters" I mean forcing you to spend a weekend in Northern Vermont, where in February, the weather is considered enjoyably balmy if it *miraculously* rises above zero.]

While I have your attention, I have some questions. First of all, HTH does Tuck get from a free standing tank in the middle of the classroom to the sink in every episode? And, um...what the dealie with 'Yo Gabba Gabba'? No seriously...W..T..F.


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1 comment:

  1. Haha. I don't even understand the last paragraph and I think thats a good thing.


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